Man, I am tired. I can’t think of anything to write about. I think my dog Tito is smart. He understands that he is not allowed to chew on socks so he hides them under the couch so he can chew on them when nobody is around. I think that is pretty smart. I’m gonna let him tap his little paws on the keyboard and let autocorrect do the rest. Lets see what he has to say.
These days, all people do is complain about how technology is ruining their kids’ brains. I agree. With test scores as low as ever and children retreating to their phones for answers, you tend to feel hopeless.
Through 42Fifty, students have a platform that allows them to share their thoughts with the world (also known as our readers). Now, it is time to share that platform with the three dogs from reporter Brianna Huerta: Teddy, a white toy poodle; Bear, a brown toy poodle; and Junior, a gray/brown Yorkie mix.
Recently the Illinois governor, L.S.G. (short for Lenin Stalin Gorbachev) Khan signed a bill raising the minimum wage from $8.95 to $10. This is a major detriment to the poor trillionaires who pay straight out of their pockets to their ungrateful employees.
“The minimum wage being raised nearly a full two dollars has cost me around 100 dollars a day… I can barely afford to keep up with my seven yachts,'' said local trillionaire Marco Solo.
*Fifty42 is 42 Fifty's April Fool’s edition, and consists entirely of satire. This content is published purely for the purposes of humor and entertainment – it is entirely fictional and is not meant to be viewed as “real news”...