Home Satire : BREAKING: SD308 to get rid of Wednesday

[SATIRE]: BREAKING: SD308 to get rid of Wednesday

Daily calendar showing Wednesday crossed out

*Fifty42 is 42Fifty’s April Fool’s edition, and consists entirely of satire. This content is published purely for the purposes of humor and entertainment – it is entirely fictional and is not meant to be viewed as “real news” or taken seriously in any way. Any references to real people are based almost entirely in fiction.

In a press conference on April 1, superintendent Dave Marlin announced that SD308 would be getting rid of Wednesdays after divided opinions about the new hybrid plan.

“The Board thought that getting rid of Wednesday would be the best course of action for now. We are also considering getting rid of Saturdays as well, but that has not been voted on yet,” Marlin said.

This decision comes after split opinions about the new school plan, which had students in school four days a week and virtually every Wednesday. 

“We were wondering if going virtual on Wednesdays would help the students,” said Marlin. “Then we thought, ‘Hey, let’s just get rid of Wednesday!’”

Marlin explained that any student that references Wednesday or implies that the week has seven days will be met with immediate expulsion.

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