Disclaimer: *Fifty42 is 42Fifty’s April Fool’s edition, and consists entirely of satire. This content is published purely for the purposes of humor and entertainment – it is entirely fictional and is not meant to be viewed as “real news” or taken seriously in any way. Any references to real people are based almost entirely in fiction.
Today, OH administrators announced that they were removing the school and replacing it with a drive-thru where students and staff go to school to order their work and learning. There are many mixed feelings due to this abrupt change.
“When I heard [OH] announced that I was shocked, I felt happy because I can work from home, but this seems like more work to drive there and back,” said OH senior Jenny Cooper.
OH plans to use the land and make a retro-style drive-thru to make it easy for staff and students to obtain their work, and even plans to include deals, like coupons, to get less work with more challenging problems for students.
“The plans our architects laid out look great! We aim to please with the style and design,” said Superintendent Michael Voorhees.
In a strong showing of student voice, OH made this change due to a student-authored 42Fifty article discussing the need to fix traffic, and OH listened to its students. With this change, schooling will be on a new level similar to that of online learning.
“I was greatly concerned when I heard about the traffic problems that our students and staff were having, so we are listening to the school and fixing the issue,” said Voorhees.
OH also added that bus transportation will no longer be needed, therefore school will never be canceled. Students requiring buses will need to pick up their work and order ahead.
OH is also replacing parking passes with a mail-in pass to help students and staff to obtain work and learning materials at home for their convenience. The new change to OH may be difficult to adapt to, but students and staff will work to make it happen.
“I am so buying the mail-in pass, it’s going to feel good when I can sleep in, go to the mailbox, get my work, and do it whenever I want,” said OH senior Mad-Max Rockatansky.
OH is heading in a direction that some have mixed feelings about, yet students and staff will have to learn to adapt to this change forever. OH might influence other schools to do the same, so prepare for the future.
I'm Enzo Elia and I really enjoy video games and talking about many topics. this is my first year on staff, I'm a senior. You can contact me by emailing 42Fifty@sd308.org and putting my name in the subject line. We welcome comments on our articles and feedback on our publication!
Such a fun article!!! Great to see OH responding to student input 🤣🤣🤣
Great job! I love the humour! 😀
I’m still in line at our schools drive through. I’ve been here for four hours 😑😖
Can’t wait
As long as it fixes traffic then it gets my approval