Home Uncategorized MS Paint gallery debuts from remote student

[SATIRE] MS Paint gallery debuts from remote student

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*Fifty42 is 42Fifty’s April Fool’s edition, and consists entirely of satire. This content is published purely for the purposes of humor and entertainment – it is entirely fictional and is not meant to be viewed as “real news” or taken seriously in any way. Any references to real people are based almost entirely in fiction.

Today, Stew Dent, a junior at Oswego High School, debuted his most recent collection of work from his graphic design class. Dent has been attending school remotely since phase 25 began, and as a result, was issued a MacBook from the district in order to Adobe programs for his graphic design class. 

Unfortunately for Dent, Photoshop and Illustrator haven’t been able to boot up on his Apple laptop, and no matter what the IT department tried to do to get it to start, the programs just refused to do so. 

“I guess it was too old,” Stew said. “I asked the district for a newer model and they essentially cackled in my face.” 

The district has been forced to purchase only MacBook’s produced prior to the year 2009 due to budget cuts over the past few years. Needless to say that these older models struggle to get the newer Adobe programs up and running. 

“That’s on the Board of Education,” Superintendent Dave Marlin said. “These budget cuts have made us look to save wherever we can, and the MacBooks were the best place to start.” 

Dent still needed to turn things in to his teacher in order to pass the class, so he looked to Ol’ Faithful: Microsoft Paint on his family’s dusty desktop that has been untouched since 2011. 

“I used to use Paint all the time in the Computer Lab while I was in elementary school,” Dent said. “I just had to go back to the time I spent in the elementary school computer lab using Microsoft Paint instead of doing whatever it was I was supposed to be doing.” 

Dent’s work focuses on landscapes. He loves the way he’s able to capture the beauty of nature in his work. 

“I love landscapes because I feel like nature speaks to me,” Dent said. “I love that I’m able to show that even OHS can climb the tallest summit, or a horse thing can run next to a tree.”

Dent is very happy with what he produced.

“This is the best stuff I’ve ever done,” Dent said. “I can’t wait to show the world these masterpieces.” 

Here’s the full collection of Dent’s work:

Editor’s note: Dent received a D+ out of pity from his teacher. I know I’m supposed to be impartial, but I consider that to be quite generous. My baby cousin has better work hanging on the fridge.

Another Editor’s note: The editor who wrote that previous editor’s note has been fired despite being 100% correct in his criticism. 

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